Compass Therapy offers hope for transformative growth throughout the lifespan. That means you can have a happy life, no matter what you go through.
The
Bible affirms this hope by assuring that God has a positive plan for
each person’s life, “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the
LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a
future and a hope” (Jer 29:11).
Neuropsychology supports this hope by showing clearly that human personality is malleable. The brain can respond to new learning even into old age.
In the therapeutic alliance the counselor and client are not just working
to solve presenting problems, but growing together as persons along
life’s way. Through the counselor’s behavioral modeling of caring and
courage, humility and esteem, the client comes to experience the interpersonal
dimension of hope for fulfilling relationships, giving and receiving love, and if the client chooses, loving and trusting God.
This brings us to a diagram that helps inspire counselees with
an overview for their lifetime growth in Christ: “The Actualizing
Ascent.” Upon showing the diagram to a counselee, you might say, “This
represents the human lifespan.”
You explain that the first half of the curve slopes upward, which represents human development the morning of life,
from birth to midlife. The tasks of this phase of life include the
acquisition of language and culture, education, experimentation with
social roles, identity formation, employment, and marriage and
child-rearing if so chosen.
As
shown by the curve’s peak, the middle vertical line designates the high
noon of midlife, and sometimes precipitates an identity crisis as
people shift from the morning to the afternoon of life.
While ambition and ego satisfaction characterize the morning of human
development, the afternoon of life requires a more interior search for
meaning, wholeness, and interpersonal fulfillment.
Carl
Jung reported that virtually all of his patients in the second half of
life were grappling with religious concerns. Though an individual may
get by the first half of life without cultivating actualizing virtues,
the lack of development in the second half of life can lead to
confusion, frustration and despair.
It’s almost as if God imbues aging with the power to arrest everyone’s attention
-- to finally say, “Look. You really are finite and temporal! You’d
better grow in me while there is still time, for without me, you will be
nothing.” The down-sloped side of the lifespan curve shows the
inexorable decline of bodily health and stamina. Wear and tear in the
body shows up in wrinkling skin, slowed metabolism, sagging muscles,
stiffened joints, vulnerability to disease, and eventually, diminished
mental capacities.
For
those who refuse to challenge their rigid personality trends during
this time, these trends intensify and take a tragic toll.
Aggressive persons become crankier and more belligerent, ever more paranoid and chronically suspicious. Dependent persons feel more anxiety-ridden and scattered. Withdrawn
people shrivel up like leather left out in the sun too long, adapting
to marginal levels of subsistence, barely getting by, and isolating from
human contact. Controlling people grow obsessively worried about the things they can’t control, raising their blood pressure and shortening their tempers.
The goods news, though, is that people can grow increasingly wise, patient, and mature in the second half of life.
This is represented by the upward-sloped dotted curve, you explain,
which shows a person’s potential for actualizing psychological and
spiritual growth.
Indeed, Christians are blessed to know that Christ will help them become more whole through anything they face, and will personally welcome them to everlasting life at the moment of death.
Compass Therapy encourages continued growth and development throughout life.
You explain to counselees that individuals who begin growing
psychologically and spiritually in their thirties, forties, or fifties
tend to keep growing in their sixties, seventies, and beyond.
Since the human personality is malleable, exercising the LAWS of personality
(Love and Assertion; Weakness and Strength) and the compass virtues
(caring and courage; humility and esteem) promote health and fulfillment
even into old age.
Perhaps
the single most important attitude that Compass Therapy seeks to impart
is that change is normal and the need for growth common to all people.
Equipped with an actualizing perspective, stagnation is forsaken in
favor of the ongoing transformation of one’s personality and relationships, conjoined with a deepening trust in the Holy Spirit’s help and guidance.
When counselees internalize this health model for hope, grace, and transformation, they learn to face the coming years with increased flexibility and resourcefulness.
The Actualizing Ascent Diagram helps counselees see the importance of exchanging rigidity for rhythm,
egocentricity for actualizing development, manipulation for
authenticity, and personality idiosyncrasies for compass virtues.
In
this way, the invitation of Christ, the witness of the counselor, and
the vision of the counselee converge in the pursuit of a life lived
gracefully, accruing in wholeness and purpose. Though there are
quintessential tough times and challenging adversities, the overall
direction is toward an actualizing ascent in Jesus Christ.
